Monthly Photos: Five Months

(A little late sharing this one!)

Sweet boy,

You had a slight hiccup in your fifth month. After being away on vacation for over two weeks, you returned home and your streak as the best baby sleeper ever came screeching to a halt. You were your normal cheerful self during the day, but for the first time since the first weeks we had you home, you were up every couple of hours each night. I was one tired mama, but walking in to see you and holding you against me as you drifted back into a sweet sleep always made the tired nights more bearable.

We tried one night to let you soothe yourself back to sleep. Only one night. I sat, crouched down next to your crib, and peeked at you from under the bumper as my heart broke with every cry. I'd touch you at very precisely timed increments to reassure you that you hadn't been abandoned, but after 40 minutes, I couldn't bare it any longer. So ended our brief attempt at sleep training. My rationale was that you weren't ready for it, but I think it was me that wasn't ready for it. I reasoned that you would be small and need me like this for just a blink and then you'd be grown up and off to college. We'd figure out another way to get you to sleep. Getting up with you the next few nights was like the sweetest reunion. I would smile to myself, guilty over how much I enjoyed being the only thing that could soothe you back to sleep.

You had your first cold in your fifth month. Luckily, it was pretty mild for both of us. I missed work for the first time to keep you home to prevent the spread of germs and though I hated to see you stuffy, I was glad to get to stay home with you that week.

As I see your little personality develop, I can't help but imagine what you will do and who you will be one day. My greatest pride is being your mama and no matter where you go in this world, you will always be my tiny child.

I love you so much more than you will ever know, my precious son.

August 26, 2011

Comments

[Mom N]

I truly understand.